Passive Followers? No, thank you! But this doesn't mean that the woman should start leading. Find out how. 

To be active in dance as a woman means a lot of things, such as:

BEING RECEPTIVE

Not over-receptive and not under-receptive. When the man leads you a certain step or combination of steps, you have to follow the steps with the musicality that he intended to transmit you.

A lot of times, women know by heart certain combinations of steps and the first impulse that the man gives is enough for her to remember the whole combination and she will be tempted to execute the steps more rapidly than the man wanted her to move.

Other times, when she doesn’t know the combination but she could do it if she were paying more attention, she chooses not to move, or move in a way that she knows already (probably out of fear), thus altering the whole sequence.

These examples are not Following. This is moving from inertia and it is not at all pleasant for your partner.

ESTABLISHING & MAINTAINING CONNECTION 

It is your responsibility as a follower as well to participate to the frame or search for the connection (the specific connection points such as the arms, the back, and the neck). There are moments in dance, especially in Urban Kiz, where the man will no longer see you and you can help him by touching him and re-establishing connection. He doesn’t have to chase you all the time; you have to chase each other.

BALANCE

A lot of women think that they need a man to hold on to in order to keep their axis, but the bitter truth is that you have to work for yourself in order to reach that axis.

Urban Kiz is a dance in which the man places the woman on only one foot a lot of times, it has a lot of pivots, spins and pirouettes that the man will only lead, and it is the woman’s job to execute them correctly, elegantly and with musicality.

In order for this to be possible, women have to practice by themselves a lot. They have to work on their balance using specific exercises, practicing spins alone, trying to maintain their balance on only one foot for as long as they can. After doing so, they will inevitably reach to the healthy conclusion that they have to learn as much as the man in order to reach their full potential and it is not enough to ”let the man lead you”.

MUSICALITY & LADY STYLING 

Most women think that they understand music better than men, but the truth is most of the times, when they are beginners, men have to focus on so many things that they literally don’t have enough attention to also listen to the music. For this reason, musicality comes a bit later for men than for women.

Therefore, in order to exchange boredom for entertainment, women should focus more on the music instead of memorizing steps. Women are very good at remembering steps, and a lot of times the man will not have the chance of learning how to lead, because women will dance “by themselves”. They will not have enough patience to wait for the man’s leading, so they will do the steps that they already know.

In order to prevent that, women should concentrate on the beat, the music, the musical phrases, the accents and so on. While the man learns his part, the woman should be able to mark the music with her own moves, without disturbing the connection. This is a great skill that men love and appreciate. 

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THIS HAS BEEN AN EXCERPT FROM THE BOOK: Urban Kiz - history, concepts, steps, by Alexandru Eugen Cristea & Iulia Maria Badiu. Find out more details on our BOOKS page.